What is low SELF Esteem
Low self-esteem is when you don’t believe in yourself or think you're not good enough. It can make you feel insecure, unsure, and super worried about failing. Here’s how it can show up:
- Lack of Confidence: You might feel like everyone else is better at things than you or that you’re not capable of doing something right.
- Negative Self-Talk: You catch yourself thinking things like “I’m not smart enough” or “I always mess up” without even realizing it.
- Fear of Failing: You might avoid trying new things because you’re scared of failing or being judged, even if the chance of failure is pretty small.
- Shying Away from Socializing: If you feel like you're not “enough,” you might stay away from people because you’re afraid of being judged or feeling out of place.
Perfectionism: You set crazy-high standards for yourself, thinking you have to be perfect all the time, or else you’re not good enough.
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Common Causes of Self Esteem issues
Bad stuff in childhood
Social Media and Comparing Yourself to Others
Social Media and Comparing Yourself to Others
- Abuse or Neglect: If you grew up in a tough environment where you were mistreated or didn’t get enough care, it can really hurt your self-worth later in life (Briere, 1992).
- Unrealistic Expectations: When parents or other caregivers push you to be perfect all the time, it can make you feel like you’re never enough. Studies show that this can seriously affect your self-esteem (Harter, 2012).
Social Media and Comparing Yourself to Others
Social Media and Comparing Yourself to Others
Social Media and Comparing Yourself to Others
- Instagram and TikTok Pressure: Seeing everyone’s “perfect” life online can make you feel like you’re falling behind or not good enough. Research shows that social media can make teens feel worse about themselves because of constant comparison (Fardouly et al., 2015).
- Peer Pressure: Whether it’s about looks, style, or social status, constantly comparing yourself to your friends or classmates can lower your self-esteem. A lot of teens feel this pressure, and it’s one of the reasons why self-esteem drops (Rosenberg, 1965).
Bullying or Being Left Out
Social Media and Comparing Yourself to Others
Life Struggles and Tough Events
- Bullying: If you’ve ever been bullied or made fun of, you know how damaging it can be. It messes with your confidence and can make you feel worthless. Studies show that being bullied, whether online or in person, is strongly linked to low self-esteem (Kumpulainen et al., 2008).
- Feeling Excluded: If you’ve ever felt left out or like you don’t belong, it can seriously mess with how you see yourself. Research shows that feeling excluded from social groups or rejected by friends can lower self-esteem (Eisenberger et al., 2003).
Life Struggles and Tough Events
Life Struggles and Tough Events
Life Struggles and Tough Events
- Losing Someone Close: Losing a friend or family member can make you feel lost and like you don’t matter as much. Studies show that grief can really hurt how you feel about yourself (Stroebe et al., 2007).
- Family Drama or Divorce: When things are rocky at home, like parents fighting or a divorce, it can make you feel insecure. Research has shown that family issues are linked to low self-esteem (Amato, 2001).
Mental Health Issues
Life Struggles and Tough Events
Not Feeling Successful Enough
- Depression or Anxiety: If you’re feeling anxious or down a lot, it can make you think you’re not good enough, even when you’re trying hard. Studies say that mental health problems, especially in teens, often cause a drop in self-esteem (Frost & Kwapil, 2014).
- Body Image Issues: Constantly worrying about your looks, especially when you see what other people look like online, can really affect your confidence. Research shows that having a bad body image is a huge reason people struggle with self-esteem (Grabe et al., 2008).
Not Feeling Successful Enough
Life Struggles and Tough Events
Not Feeling Successful Enough
- School or Work Struggles: If you’re failing tests, getting bad grades, or just not doing as well as you think you should be, it can make you feel like you’re not capable. Studies have shown that struggling in school or work can hurt how you feel about yourself (Stein et al., 2008).
- Perfectionism: If you feel like you have to be perfect all the time, you’re probably going to beat yourself up every time something goes wrong. Research shows that perfectionism is strongly tied to low self-esteem, especially when things don’t go as planned (Shafran & Mansell, 2001).
Society’s Expectations
Negative Thoughts About Yourself
Negative Thoughts About Yourself
- Cultural Pressure: Society sometimes pushes people to look a certain way or achieve certain things. If you don’t fit the “ideal” image, it can make you feel less confident. Studies have found that the pressure to meet these standards can lower self-esteem (Furnham & Badmin, 1994).
- Discrimination: If you’ve ever faced discrimination because of your race, gender, or background, it can make you feel like you're not good enough. Research shows that discrimination can seriously impact self-esteem (Meyer, 2003).
Negative Thoughts About Yourself
Negative Thoughts About Yourself
Negative Thoughts About Yourself
- Internalizing Criticism: If people are constantly putting you down, or if you tell yourself you’re not good enough, it can really affect your self-esteem. Studies show that negative feedback, especially when internalized, can hurt self-worth (Cohen & Wills, 1985).
- Seeing the Worst in Yourself: Sometimes, we just focus on everything that’s wrong instead of the good stuff. If you’re always thinking you’re failing, it can make your self-esteem even lower. Research shows that people with low self-esteem tend to focus on their flaws (Beck, 1976).
Not Having Enough Support
Negative Thoughts About Yourself
Not Having Enough Support
- Feeling Isolated: If you don’t have people to talk to or rely on, it can make you feel like you’re not worthy of support. Studies show that not having social support can lead to lower self-esteem (Thoits, 1995).
- Toxic Relationships: If you’re stuck in a toxic friendship or relationship where you’re constantly belittled, it can destroy your confidence. Research has shown that being in unhealthy relationships can lead to major drops in self-esteem (Campbell et al., 2005).
Stress or Health Problems
Stress or Health Problems
Not Having Enough Support
- Chronic Illness: Dealing with health problems or disabilities can make you feel like you're not “normal” or like you’re different from everyone else. Studies show that long-term health issues can really lower self-esteem (Markowitz & Cherniss, 2005).
- Constant Stress: When life feels overwhelming, whether it’s school, work, or personal stuff, it can make you feel like you’re not handling things well, which can hurt your self-esteem. Research shows that chronic stress can make you feel inadequate (Wheaton, 1999).